Author: Sarah

- Sarah 3 Comments

From poppy seed to pumpkin: 32 weeks pregnant

Today I am 32 weeks pregnant, and I have some good news. I went for a scan to check the position of my placenta today and…. it’s moved which means I don’t have to have a caesarean! If you have been reading my previous pregnancy updates you’ll know this is something I was really worried about. I had almost convinced myself that the placenta wasn’t going to have moved so that I wouldn’t be too disappointed when they gave me the news. It took a while to find out as well. When the sonographer did the normal ultrasound the baby’s head was in the way so although she could see where the placenta started, and it was quite high up, she couldn’t see the all important lower edge. That meant I had to have an internal scan to get a better view and she measured the placenta as being 4.6 cm from the edge of the cervix. According to the doctor who we saw after the scan, if the placenta is on the front then a gap of 3 cm is enough but if it’s only the back (as mine is) then they need 4.5 cm before they will sign off on a vaginal birth.

I’m so happy my body decided to play nice and I can go back to thinking about where I would like to give birth rather than having that choice taken away with me. I’ve not really been thinking about the possibility of a home birth these last few months because I didn’t want to get my heart set on it for it not to happen. We now have the choice between the home birth or going to the midwife-led unit at the hospital where Toby was born. I still don’t really know what I think would be best at the moment, I swing from one to other every five minutes. I think I need to write down the pros and cons of each and see if that will help me come to a decision. I’m just thankful that I now get to make that choice.

Apart from the placenta news everything else was fine with the little man. We even got to see his face (sort of) on the ultrasound today. I’ve not been feeling too bad on the whole. I’m still getting ligament pains in my bump quite regularly, despite doing my best to avoid any movements that might bring them on. There are lots of wriggles and kicks still, although at times it’s a bit more squirming than anything else. Sometimes he manages to get himself in a really uncomfortable position that gives me pain in my bump, back and hip. It was really bad last weekend but a lie down helped him move and get into a different position. At least with only one more week at work to go I can hopefully get a bit more rest over the next couple of months and things won’t get too much more uncomfortable as the baby grows and has even less space to move!

I see the midwife again in two weeks and I’ll have another update then. Perhaps by then I might be nearer to making a decision about where I want to have this baby!

32 weeks pregnant

- Sarah 2 Comments

Nursery wobbles // an update

I was reading a post today by the lovely Eline at Pasta & Patchwork about how her 3 year old (affectionately known as the Bean) has been going through some separation anxiety as she gears up for a work trip away from home. It made me think about this post I wrote back in April about Toby’s nursery wobbles and I thought it was about time I wrote an update.

We’ve had a few more ups and downs since April but happily things seem to be settling down a lot now. There haven’t been any more staff changes at nursery recently and Toby appears to have got used to the new people. I’m sure it also helps that all his teeth have now come through, and eventually we got his awful nappy rash cleared up too.

There are still some days when he cries as I’m leaving but we aren’t having the same drama just getting his shoes on and into the car. Usually if there is something to distract him as soon as he arrives at nursery (a ball or balloons are sure fire winners here) then I can leave without so much of a shout. Sometimes he’s so distracted he doesn’t even say goodbye but often I get a wave accompanied by an enthusiastic ‘Die!’ (yeah, we need to work on that one!) or his new party trick which is blowing a kiss.

Toby is still eating everything they put in front of him at nursery (although hardly putting on any weight – should I be worried about that?). His naps have got even better too and he usually sleeps for about two hours in the afternoon.

Sleeping at night has improved too. We still have some nights when he won’t go to sleep unless I stay in the room, or nights when he wakes up, and frustratingly when he does wake up he tends to take ages to get back to sleep. Last night I ended up sleeping on his bedroom floor from half two until half three because he just stood up and started crying whenever I left the room. But on the whole he sleeps through a lot more than he doesn’t so I can cope with that. We’re also trying to do away with his bedtime bottle at the moment because I think at nearly two he really doesn’t need a bottle any more. We’ve started giving him milk in a cup when he gets in from nursery instead and then he has the hour or so before bed time to drink it.

So, although things still aren’t perfect they’re a big improvement from where they were a few months ago. Hopefully Toby will stay settled at nursery – we’re going to keep him going every day until after the baby is born so he has some stability and doesn’t have to deal with lots of changes all at once. He will be moving to part time in the Autumn but we’ve not decided exactly what days and hours that will be yet. I just hope he stays happy and we don’t go back to the days of screaming and crying every time he gets dropped off.

If your little one is having wobbles about nursery or other separation anxiety then, as hard as it is at the time just try to remember…

This too

- Sarah 2 Comments

Living Arrows 23/52 (2015)

I’m super late with this week’s Living Arrows again – it seems to be happening more often than not these days! I still haven’t missed one this year though, so I’m still winning as far as I’m concerned!

Although I’ve been having a rubbish time work-wise for the last week we did have a lovely weekend last weekend. My parents were up visiting (mostly because I’d roped my mum into helping me do a second-hand baby market with me) and they took the opportunity to try out their new caravan on a campsite in Callander which is about an hour away from where we live. We went out to see them on Sunday morning and Toby loved running around with his ball and looking at all the sheep with my dad. He loves balls at the moment – whenever he sees on he always says ‘a ball’. He’s not that bothered about playing, although he is pretty good at throwing and kicking, he mostly just likes to carry it around!

I don’t think Toby has seen a sheep in real life since he was about 10 months old but he knew what they were as soon as he saw them, and immediately started pointing and saying ‘sheeps!’ He’s learnt so many new words lately, in just the last week we’ve had bus, outside, garden, nappy, dirty, zip, burst, oh and Giggle for Iggle Piggle and Kaka for Makka Pakka on In The Night Garden, and probably some others too! He’s not putting words together much yet  – we do get ‘in there’ and ‘on there’ and he has said ‘where daddy?’ before too. I’m sure it won’t be long though before he starts properly talking and we can have a proper conversation with him (well, as much of a conversation as you can have with an almost two year old anyway).

In another breakthrough, despite another cold, Toby has slept all night all this week! He was up early last Sunday and then I think he woke once on Sunday or Monday night but every other night he has slept from about 7pm right through to the next morning. All his teeth are through now so I’m sure that’s helped but I really hope we’ve turned a corner and we’re all going to get a lot more sleep from now on!

I’ve got a few photos I wanted to share this week. This first one was taken at home while I was out at the market on Saturday morning, just look at that grin!

23_52 1

The next one was on Sunday, running around with his ball…

23_52 2

And lastly showing his grandad the plants (and momentarily giving up his ball!)

23_52 3

 

Living Arrows
- Sarah 4 Comments

The one where everything seems a bit crap

OK, before I start I know I don’t really have anything to complain about in the grand scheme of things; I have a wonderful husband and an adorable son (and another one on the way). I have a lovely family and we are all healthy. We have a nice house and we earn enough to live comfortably… But that doesn’t mean that sometimes things can all just seem a bit, well, crap.

To start with this pregancy has been hard. It was hard enough last time when I was working full time but at least then I could come home and have a nap and be sure of a good night’s sleep. This time round I have Toby to look after too and even though he is two next month he still doesn’t consistently sleep through the night. And as helpful as Barry is, unfortunately for the last few months Toby will only settle if he wakes up in the night if I go to him – daddy just won’t do at 3am apparently! So I’ve been knackered for the entirety of this pregancy. There’s also been the fact that since the 20 week scan I’ve been dogged by a lingering sadness that it we aren’t having a girl (and it’s a disappointment I haven’t really felt I could talk about). On top of that has been the continuing worry about my low-lying placenta and as much as I try to remain positive about it I just don’t want to have a caesarean and it scares me that I might have no choice in the matter. And as the scan to find out if the placenta has moved gets nearer (next week!), I’m just getting more and more worried about it.

The lack of sleep and pregnancy hormones have really made it much harder for me to cope with anything over the last few months as well. I seem to burst into tears at the slightest thing, and I hate feeling like I’m so emotionally unstable. Added to which crying makes me wretch after a minute or two so it’s even less of a pleasant experience!

The other major source of crappiness at the moment is work. This year has been really really hard. I have been working full time at a school 45 minutes away, on a one year temporary contract. It’s not a great school and it’s in a deprived area. The behaviour of a lot of the kids is appalling and I’ve found it really hard to deal with at times. But I just kept thinking it’s only for a year and then I’ll be off with full maternity pay. Until a few weeks ago… The job I have been doing is going to become a permanent post for next year so I applied for the job. It took over a month for the school to arrange interviews. I thought I wasn’t really bothered if I got the job or not. I have no real desire to return after my maternity leave, and I was under the impression I would get full maternity either way, as was the case with my last pregnancy (albeit with a different council). And then a week before the interview the council told me if I didn’t get the permanent post I would only be entitled to statutory maternity pay and not the additional pay which would top it up to my full salary for the first 13 weeks of maternity leave. Suddenly the stakes were much higher.

I appreciate the school were in an awkward situation; if they gave me the permanent job they would also have to find someone else to cover my maternity leave. But equally, they couldn’t not give me the job just because I am pregnant. I thought I had fitted in well at the school and within the department, there haven’t been any issues with regards to my performance throughout the year as far as I am aware, so I thought I stood a good chance of being given the job. The interview on Friday morning seemed to go well but I got a phone call from the head teacher on Friday afternoon to tell me they were offering the job to someone else. I spent most of Friday evening crying. This feels much worse than applying for a job and not getting it. This feels like a judgement on everything I have done for the last year. It feel like the 50 mile commute every day, having other people look after my son for 9 hours a day (and paying half my salary for the privilege), the dealing with horrible, disrespectful kids day in day out, has all been a big waste of my time. I am still waiting for feedback from the head teacher about the interview and how they came to their decision. According to my head of faculty who was also on the interview panel the successful candidate ‘just had more to say’, which is no kind of reason at all. I am pretty convinced there are two main reasons why I wasn’t given the job; the first is that I’m pregnant and the second that I am at the top of the teacher pay scale. Of course they’ll never admit this and it’s going to be hard to prove but I’ll see what feedback I get and decide if I want to try and take it any further.

On a slightly more positive note, after carefully reading the document which sets out all the conditions related to teachers pay and employment conditions in Scotland it would seem I might be entitled to my full maternity pay after all. I have gone back to the council and I’m just waiting to see what they say. In my experience council HR departments are pretty useless and seem to rely on people just accepting what they say. My last employers found out that I’m not one of those people when I argued and argued until they eventually agreed to a £5000 redundancy payment after previously telling me they didn’t have a job for me and I wasn’t entitled to anything. I’ll see what this council has to say but I’m prepared for another fight if I need to be! As you can imagine though, any motivation I had to do my job has swiftly disappeared. Thankfully I only have two and half weeks to go until the start of the summer holidays and I am counting down the days!

Apologies for the brain dump, this probably should have been two separate posts but as you can see there has been a lot of crapness in my life lately and just getting it out of my brain has helped me feel a bit better about things. Hopefully in another couple of weeks things will start to look a bit more positive. I’ll be off work and I’m hoping I’ll get a bit of time to relax and catch up on some sleep. I’ll know one way or the other what is going to happen with baby boy’s birth and even if it is a caesarean I’ll know at least and be able to start preparing for it. And lastly, if I’ve read the policy correctly there should be some good news about my pay too.

And while I wait, I’ll try and remember this…

364d6-hope

 

- Sarah Leave a comment

From poppy seed to pumpkin: 30 weeks pregnant

I’m now 30 weeks pregnant (plus a few days), and I can’t believe that means there are only 10 weeks to go! I’m actually hoping this one comes a bit early like his brother did, I’m certainly hoping there’s more like 9 weeks left rather than 12!

30 weeks pregnant

Things are still ticking along nicely. I saw the midwife at 29 weeks and everything was fine. She couldn’t get a good position to hear the baby’s heart beat but we could hear the blood pulsing through the cord, and the little one was giving her a good kick at the time so there were certainly no concerns! The only thing that came up at the appointment was that I found out my placenta is actually overlying the cervix, not just low-lying as I’d thought. Apparently it was in my notes but the sonographer didn’t mention it at the 20 week scan. My extensive Googling on the matter (I know, I really shouldn’t) tells me that there is less chance of the placenta having moved if it is actually covering the cervix so I was quite upset about that. I had been holding on to the hope that it would have moved by the time we have the scan to check at the end of next week but it seems like that might be less likely than I’d hoped. I’ve been trying to think of all the advantages of having a caesarean in case that is the way it goes. So far I’ve come up with: 1) It will be easier to arrange for my mum and dad to look after Toby if I know when I’ll be in hospital and 2) I won’t be in agony every time I do a wee for a week after giving birth. That’s all I’ve got so far – can anyone help me out with any more advantages because I’m really still not sold on the idea!

Other than placenta worries I’ve been doing OK. My bump seems to be huge now, and my little monkey is still as wriggly as ever. It seems to be a bit more bums and heads than arms and legs most of the time now so isn’t quite as painful. I’m still getting some ligament pain in my bump, particularly if I’m lying on my side without support from a pillow, and when it comes it’s absolute agony. My lower back and hips have been quite sore lately too, particularly when I’ve been on my feet a lot which is somewhat unavoidable when I’m still teaching full time. I’m so looking forward to the summer holidays and starting maternity leave – less than three weeks to go now!

Emotionally I’m all over the place at the moment to. I seem to have been doing no end of crying over the last few weeks. Sometimes over things that are worth crying about, but mostly about the stupidest things. Barry is being a superstar about it all – he always knows when I just need a hug or when I’m crying about something daft and he can make a joke to cheer me up.

This post doesn’t seem to be very positive but really, everything is OK. It’s just hard being this pregnant with a demanding toddler and working full time with equally demanding teenagers!

My next update will probably be after I’ve had the next scan at 32 weeks to check the placenta. Hopefully I’ll have some good news but I’m trying my best to mentally prepare myself for it to be the news I really don’t want to hear.

- Sarah 2 Comments

Review: Trespass Edwin men’s waterproof jacket

Living in Scotland we are always in need of good waterproof jackets – you just never know what the weather is going to do up here! I have a coat from Trespass that I wear almost every day (and it still goes over my baby bump just about), so when Trespass got in touch and asked if we’d like to review something from their website I decided I would give the honour to Barry and let him get a new coat to try out (and try out some of his catalogue poses for the photos too!).

Trespass Edwin

He chose the Edwin men’s waterproof jacket in khaki (RRP £149.99, currently £49.99 on the Trespass website). This coat is rated as TP100 which means it has the highest technical specification that Trespass offer. It is waterproof to 10000mm, breathable to 5000mvp and is also windproof and has taped seams which prevent rain from entering the jacket through the stitching. The adjustable hood is removable and the coat has 3 outer zipped pockets and two inside pockets.

Trespass Edwin men's waterproof jacket

I’ll hand you over to Barry now so he can tell you what he thinks of his new Trespass jacket…

The outer material is waterproof, though I haven’t been caught in rain heavy enough to really test this, and the lining is thick and warm enough for typical chilly mornings without feeling heavy. All the seams and zips are cleanly stitched, which should further add to the waterproofing.

The hood is snug and can be detached easily, and there are plenty of pockets for everyday use. The standard exterior pockets are deep enough, though perhaps could use slightly wider openings for bigger handed customers. There are also pockets beside the zip and in the inside lining, for waterproof storage.

Trespass Edwin jacket

The only problem I had with the coat was the initial stiffness of the exterior fabric. Bending over would cause the material around the waist to crumple and poke out in unusual rigid folds. However after a few weeks of occasional wear the material has softened a lot and the effect is already far less obvious.

This really is only a minor niggle, to be honest. Overall, this is a comfortable and well-constructed coat and I’m sure it’ll get a lot of wear throughout the coming year.

**Disclosure: We were sent the Trespass Edwin men’s waterproof jacket in return for this review. All opinions are our own.

We're going on an adventure
- Sarah 3 Comments

Living Arrows 22/52 (2015)

It’s been another quiet week here in the Toby Goes Bananas house. It was my birthday on Thursday but with no babysitter and work the next day anyway we didn’t really do anything – I was suffering with a sore arm after having my whooping cough vaccine in the afternoon but we did have a chippy tea and sticky toffee pudding and ice cream for tea though!

We don’t really get much time together as a family during the week, by the time we’ve got home from work and picked Toby up from nursery we only see him for a couple of hours at most in the evenings. Weekends are always filled with chores like washing and shopping but we have been trying to make sure we get out and do something together every weekend. It’s easier now Toby only has a nap in the afternoon, as long as we are up and about early enough (although 5 am on Saturday was a bit too early thanks Toby!) there’s plenty of time to go somewhere or do something before lunch.

This week we decided to go and have a look at the Kelpies, two giant horses head statues in Falkirk which is not far from where we live. I had been before but Barry hadn’t so we drove over for a look. We managed to get our Me & Mine photo taken in front of the horses (before Toby decided he really didn’t want to be in the buggy any more) and then he had fun walking around whilst I tried to make sure he didn’t fall into any of the water surrounding the statues! There was a grassy hill where he was safe enough just to run around by himself and he was loving climbing up to the top then running back down to me for a big cuddle. He’s such a bundle of energy so our weekend adventures always try and include somewhere he can blow off some steam. How happy does he look here?

22_52 15

Living Arrows
- Sarah 2 Comments

Which? Birth Choice (and giveaway)

Deciding where you would like to give birth is a big decision when you are expecting a baby and there are lots of different factors to consider. There is a lot to think about when you are preparing to have a baby, whether it is your first or you’ve got a whole brood at home already. To make the decision about where to give birth a bit easier the consumer group Which? have put together the Which? Birth Choice website (they do more than just review washing machines you know!) to help you decide.

Which Birth Choice

There are several different options available, although as a first time mum you might not be aware of them all. I know when I was pregnant with Toby I didn’t really give it that much thought. I just assumed I would give birth in hospital. My local hospital doesn’t have a maternity ward any more so I had to go to a hospital about half an hour away. As I was considered ‘low risk’ I was able to give birth in the mid-wife led unit which is part of the maternity unit. I know the decision isn’t always as straight-forward – you may have a choice of hospitals or birthing centres, or there is always the option of a home birth to consider.

The Which? Birth Choice website includes lots of helpful information about the different options of where you can birth, as well as expert advice on things like water births, pain relief and who might look after you during labour. There is also a unique birth choice tool which can help you make your decision. By answering a few simple questions and giving your postcode the tool will give you the options which may be best suited to your circumstances.

As well as using the Birth Choice tool, the lovely people at Which? also sent me three birth boxes, each containing things I might need or find useful in each of the different birth settings.

Hospital Birth

In the hospital birth box there were all sorts of things that would definitely make a hospital birth more comfortable; an eye mask and ear plug set for those noisy maternity wards, an iTunes gift card to fill my phone with music or movies for those early stages of labour, the all important charging cable – no one wants a dead phone when it’s time for those all important announcements! There were also flip flops for those swollen feet, a fan, lip balm, snacks and a very handy water bottle with a built in filter. If you give birth in hospital you may have to stay in for a day or two and all these things would really come in handy.

Birth Centre

In the birth centre box there were hair bobbles (very useful for most people but not something I’m likely to need!), a hot water bottle to help ease those labour pains, or equally the after pains you get for the few days after the baby is born, a dressing gown and slippers to keep you nice and comfortable for both during labour and after the baby is born, and lastly a spring water spray to keep you nice and cool whilst you are in labour.

Home birth

Lastly, the home birth box contained a birthing ball – I loved my birthing ball during my last pregnancy for helping me to get more comfortable and it was very useful in the early stages of labour too. There was also a waterproof mattress cover – essential to keep things clean when you are giving birth at home, a lavender aromatherapy room spray which can help to relieve tension and stress, and lastly a lovely receiving blanket for after the baby is born. In this box there were also some extra Cowshed products, such as moisturisers, stretch mark oil and body washes for both me and the baby as an extra gift from Which?

There is so much great advice on the Which? Birth Choice website and I would definitely recommend you take a look if you are unsure about where you would like to give birth. And as for me? Well, unfortunately for me it isn’t quite as straightforward as just deciding for myself. In three weeks I will have another scan to see if my placenta as moved away from my cervix. If it hasn’t then I will have to have a caesarean and this will be in the consultant-led unit of my nearest maternity unit. If the placenta has moved enough to allow a vaginal birth but is still close to the cervix then I may be able to give birth in the midwife-led unit where Toby was born. And if at has totally moved out of the way and there is a low risk of complications then I might still get the home birth I was hoping for, and which the Which? Birth Choice tool also recommended for me.

The lovely people at Which? are also giving you the chance to get your hands on three birth boxes worth £250. All you need to do is test your knowledge of the different birth choices by answering the questions in the widget below (Hint: Take a look at the Which? Birth Choice website if you aren’t sure of any of the answers!)

- Sarah 8 Comments

Me & Mine: A Family Portrait (May 2015)

Hurray! I actually managed to publish my Me & Mine post on the right day for once!

May saw me have two Mondays off work, an abandoned holiday, more teething, hit and miss sleep from Toby and finally my birthday. I also moved into the third trimester of my pregnancy, I can’t believe I’ve only got 11 weeks to go, and perhaps even less if this one decides to make an early appearance like his brother.

Toby is still being brilliant (most of the time), he’s learnt lots of new words this month, including ‘thank you’ which I am very happy about. He’s started counting and learning some of his colours too. He’s understanding more every day, I’m loving this stage in his development and can’t wait until we can have a proper conversation. He’s also started telling us when he has done a poo – the first step towards potty training perhaps?

This month’s Me & Mine picture was taken yesterday at the Kelpies in Falkirk, which is not far from where we live. I know you can’t see us very well on the photo but I think it’s worth it to get the horses in too!

May 2015