1 April , 2016 - Sarah 6 Comments

Is seven months too young for nursery?

After three settling in sessions Gabe is having his first full afternoon at nursery today. He is seven and a half months old and technically he doesn’t really need to be there. I’m not working at the moment – I’m still receiving maternity pay from my former employer but as I was on a temporary contract I don’t have a job to go back to. So there is no real reason why I couldn’t look after Gabe at home, like I have been doing for the last seven and a half months.

But the thing is, I’m exhausted. Gabe is not an easy baby to take care of. Whether it’s due to his reflux or just the way he is Gabe is not a baby who will just sit quietly and play for longer than a few minutes. I wouldn’t even mind if he was happy sat on my knee or cuddling with me but he constantly wriggles and writhes, he wants you to stand up with him and when he’s pushing a stone and a half that isn’t easy to do for long.

Oh, and Gabe is not a fan of the afternoon nap either. I don’t really know why – he generally naps well in the mornings, an hour or two in his crib but in the afternoons he will only really sleep either in the car, or sometimes on me at home. I don’t really mind that so much; I get some nice sleepy cuddles and a chance to catch up on some TV but it doesn’t give me chance to do anything else.

Toby already goes to nursery four afternoons a week – he used to go full time when I was at work and when Gabe was born we decided to keep him going part time. He enjoys it, he gets to do things he doesn’t do at home, and if I do go back to work and he has to go back full time then hopefully it won’t be too much of a shock for him.

A month or so ago, after another sleepless night and another minor breakdown from me we decided that it would probably help everyone if Gabe was to go to nursery one afternoon a week too. Barry and I are happy with this decision and yet why, when I tell people do I feel embarrassed? I feel like I’m admitting I can’t cope with looking after my children myself. I know lots of people who’s kids are regularly looked after by their grandparents or other relatives and no-one bats an eyelid but we don’t have that option – our nearest relatives live over 200 miles away.

I know there are probably thousands of mums (and dads) around the country who look after their kids all day every day on their own and seriously, I take my hat of to them. Because I can’t do it. Looking after two little boys is exhausting and I felt like I was going slowly insane. I was irritable and snappy with Toby when he doesn’t deserve that, and I wasn’t giving Gabe all the attention he needs either.

Gabe’s been fine at nursery so far as you can probably see from the photos I’ve taken from his online learning journal. I think it might even do him good to be somewhere else and get some stimulation from being with different people and doing different things.

And I’m hoping that this one afternoon a week, when I will have chance to work on my blog, or go to the dentist, or catch up on chores, or even catch up on some sleep, will help me be a better mummy the rest of the time. And I refuse to feel guilty for that.

20 March , 201620 March , 2016 - Sarah 3 Comments

Gabriel is seven months old

I’m Oh my goodness – seven months old already. Time is totally flying by!

This month has been a pretty miserable one for Gabe unfortunately. He had just got over a cold and croup (which thankfully only lasted a day or two) when he caught another cold that went on for over two weeks. He was so full of snot and there was tons of mucus coming out of his eyes as well which then ended up needing eye drops. It’s so horrible when a baby has a cold; it affects their sleep and feeding and there’s not really much you can do to help them apart from administer Calpol and cuddles.

It didn’t help that on top of the cold Gabe also had the first of his top teeth coming at the same time – poor boy! He now has three teeth and the second top one doesn’t look to be far behind either.

Despite all the illness Gabe has still been managing plenty of smiles, especially for his brother who he clearly adores. And Toby loves making Gabe smile or laugh too which is so lovely to watch.

He has been making some more physical developments this month too – he can now sit confidently and unsupported, he can roll both ways and he is starting to try and get his knees under himself when he’s on his tummy. He’s really starting to get interested in everything now, and will even sit and play with toys on his own for a while.

He now weighs 17lb 11oz and is 73cm tall. He’s mostly wearing 9-12 month clothes now – I do make them tall!

Gabe is still sleeping in our room in the Chicco Next 2 Me – I think we’re going to have to move him into his cot soon though as he’s starting to try and roll over in his sleep and keeps getting jammed up against the sides of the crib. Which means we’re going to have to make a decision about where we are going to put the cot. The long term plan is that Toby and Gabe will share a room but with Gabe still waking up between 4 and 5 am most mornings I’m not sure that’s such a good idea yet. The cot will just about fit next to our bed, but it’s going to be squeeze!

Talking of sleep; things were a bit disrupted with Gabe being ill but we seem to be back to going to bed about 6:30 pm and sleeping through to somewhere between 4 and 5 am. He sometimes wakes up earlier in the night but I can usually get him back to sleep by putting his dummy back in and giving him a rub on the back. I usually bring him downstairs when he wakes in the morning and after a bottle he will sometimes go back to sleep with me on the sofa. It doesn’t always work like that though and sometimes 4:30 am can see him up for the day!

We’ve got into quite a good routine with morning naps now and he will usually have another bottle between 9 and 9:30 am depending what time he got up and then nap in his crib for between an hour and a half to two hours. We’ve had two mammoth three hour naps this week, but I think that’s because he’s still recovering from all his illness.

Afternoon naps don’t tend to go so well though! At the moment I’m trying to get him to stay awake when we take Toby to nursery at 1 pm so that we can get home, have another bottle and have another nap but this doesn’t always work. The trouble is if he falls asleep in the car then that 10 or 15 minutes means he thinks he’s done sleeping for the afternoon, which of course is fine until he’s super-grumpy and ready for bed at 4 pm! We have managed to stick to the plan a few times this week, and he’s had his afternoon nap for an hour or so on me while I watch TV. In a way I’d like it if he’d have his afternoon nap in his crib as well but I do quite enjoy the sleepy cuddles too…

I suppose the big development this month has been weaning. I think Gabe had just had a couple of days on solids at his last monthly update – a month in and he’s really getting the hang of it. I wouldn’t say he has three meals a day but he sits in his high chair three times and has something to eat. So far it’s mostly just been bits of what Toby is having. He seems to quite like cucumber and he’s loving bread sticks – but I think that’s maybe just because they are easy to get in his mouth! He really likes yoghurt and those fruit purée pouches too and he seems just as happy being spoon fed as he is having finger foods.

I think that’s probably about it for this month. I’m hoping next month brings less illness and more sleep for everyone! And how could I finish this update without sharing this adorable picture of my little teddy bear?

Until next month then here’s Gabe from one week to seven months old…

18 February , 2016 - Sarah 6 Comments

Gabriel is six months old

Jeezy peeps! Six months old already. I’m sure with Toby it took a lot longer to get to this point but it seems like with Gabe that I blinked and suddenly my tiny newborn baby is sitting in a high chair sucking on a bagel!

This last month has been a bit of a tough one for Gabe; he’s really been suffering with teething (we do now have a tiny corner of tooth poking through so hopefully the rest will follow soon) and he’s had a horrible cold for the last few days including a nasty croupy cough at the weekend. He does seem to be on the mend now at least so fingers crossed he recovers fully soon.

With teething and his cold he has been off his milk a bit too which has probably made him even more grumpy. I had him weighed last week though and he’s still just under the 50th centile for weight at 16lb 15oz. He’s still very long too and has almost grown out of his 6-9 month sleepsuits already!

As well as the hint of a first tooth there have been a couple of other firsts this month too. Gabe has started sitting up by himself, although he’s still pretty wobbly. He’s managing to stay upright for longer and longer every day though and I’m sure he’ll be sitting properly by himself soon enough.

I think when he can sit up a bit better Toby will enjoy interacting with him more too. Gabe can roll both ways as well now but he doesn’t really seem that bothered about doing it very much at the moment!

The other first this month has just been happening in the last few days and that is Gabe’s first food. I remember being very eager to start weaning with Toby but this time I not that excited about the prospect if I’m honest! Gabe hasn’t really shown that much interest in food but we decided to just put him in the high chair, put a few things in front of him and see what happened. Actually, I gave him a bit of bread stick to try last week – he sucked on it and did swallow a bit but threw it back up a few minutes later so I wasn’t entirely sure how things were going to go.

Yesterday Toby was having a cinnamon raisin bagel for lunch so I gave Gabe a bit to try. Probably not top of the list of first weaning foods but it’s much easier to just give Gabe whatever Toby is having! I also gave him a little bit of melon too. He certainly got the idea of what he was supposed to do with it much quicker than Toby did. It was weeks before Toby would pick anything up and put it in his mouth by himself but within a few minutes Gabe was giving that bagel a good old suck! I’m not sure how much of it he ate (if any) but there seemed to be less by the end than what he started with. He had a good go on the melon too, and today tried some toast, a bit more melon and some cucumber.

I’m sure with Gabe we’ll end up following the same combination of baby led weaning and spoon feeding. Toby never had purée, he always just ate what we did but if it was something messy that needed a spoon then I would feed him. Perhaps Gabe will have other ideas about spoon feeding but that’s the general plan anyway.

Speaking of feeding, Gabe is still having Gaviscon in his milk and ranitidine for his reflux. I actually thought last month that he was getting a lot better but then teething and a cold seems to have brought his symptoms back with a vengeance. He isn’t sick as much now although we still have the odd day with lots of sick but he was definitely showing symptoms of more silent reflux in the last few weeks. He’s had his ranitidine dose increased now and that seems to be keeping things under control again for the moment.

As I mentioned earlier Gabe has had a cold for the last week or so too. I actually ended up taking him to the out of hours GP at the weekend because he was so congested and seemed to be struggling for breath. He had what sounded like croup but the doctor gave him a good check over and decided he didn’t need any treatment, and thankfully we only had one really sleepless night and he’s been getting slowly better since.

And talking of sleepless nights – on the whole Gabe sleeps really well at night. He usually goes to bed about 6:30 pm and sleeps until some time between 4 and 5 am. Sometimes he wakes a bit earlier but I can usually get him back to sleep again by putting his dummy back in and giving him a rub on the back – this is one reason I’m glad he still sleeps in his co-sleeper crib next to me in our room! I do wish he could just manage another hour in bed – getting up at 6 doesn’t seem anywhere near as bad as getting up at 5! It wouldn’t be too bad if he went back to sleep again. Sometimes he does and I manage to get back to bed for a bit but fairly regularly Gabe is just falling back to sleep when Toby is getting up. Naps are still a bit hit and miss – the really bad teething week did mess up his naps a lot but thankfully we seem to be back to a decent morning nap of an hour and a half to two hours which he has in bed unless we’re out in which case he’ll sleep in the car or the buggy. Afternoon naps are a bit more haphazard and tend to happen in the car more often than not. I’m hoping we might crack an afternoon nap at home at some point – Toby is at nursery four afternoons a week so if Gabe would have a decent nap at home I might actually manage to get some things done around the house!

Anyway I think that’s probably about it for this month – I can’t wait to see what the next month brings..

20 January , 201627 January , 2016 - Sarah 2 Comments

Gabriel is five months old

Five months old! Time is just absolutely racing by – I can’t believe Gabe is five months old already. I thought it went quickly when Toby was a baby but with Gabe it’s absolutely bonkers! I’ve just been having a read of Toby’s five month update and I know I shouldn’t compare them but it’s surprising how similar my boys are at this age.

I haven’t had Gabe weighed since he had he last set of immunisations at 19 weeks but he was 15lb 4oz then. That puts him between the 25th and 50th centiles which is pretty much where Toby was too after they were both born between the 9th and 25th. Gabe is definitely long like his brother too – he’s currently 69 cm and is wearing nearly all 6-9 month clothes already.

After a four month sleep regression Toby was back to mostly sleeping through the night at five months – I don’t know what happened though because he doesn’t sleep through any more! With Gabe his sleep hasn’t really changed much. Most nights he sleeps from about 6:30 pm until between 4 and 5 am. Sometimes he wakes up early but I can usually get him back to sleep with a little help from Ewan the Dream Sheep and a rub on the back. I’m usually up for about an hour with him early morning and he’ll have a bottle and a clean nappy then it’s back to bed, if I’m lucky for another hour or two but sometimes only half an hour or so until he’s back awake again. Having said that the last two nights he’s woken up again within an hour of going to bed, and then again in the early hours of the morning. I don’t know if he’s having a growth spurt or a leap or what but I hope whatever it is passes soon.

Gabe is still sleeping in our room in his Chicco Next 2 Me co-sleeper crib whereas Toby was sleeping in the big cot in his room from being 6 weeks old. I don’t know if this makes any difference to Gabe’s sleep. Perhaps he is disturbed by us sometimes but it also means I can resettle him if he stirs. With Toby he would have more chance to get worked up to a full on cry before we heard him on the monitor and it would usually need a bottle to get him back to sleep. I think Toby was napping better than Gabe at this age too but that is really just a result of the circumstances we now find ourselves in. With Toby I could stay at home and but him to bed when he looked like he needed to sleep but now Gabe has to fit in around nursery runs and other errands. We do usually manage to get him to have a nap at home in the morning and for the last couple of weeks he has slept for a couple of hours most mornings. I’m really lucky that Toby is so well behaved and doesn’t get up to much mischief so I can leave him downstairs whilst I put Gabe to bed. Afternoon naps for Gabe usually happen either in the car or buggy, or sometimes on my lap at home whilst I watch TV.

Gabe rolled from his front to his back a couple of weeks ago but just like his brother he did it about three times then hasn’t bothered since! He certainly wriggles around plenty when he’s lying down so I’m sure it won’t be long before he’s rolling all over the place. He’s not sitting up yet but he’s fairly stable and just needs a little bit of support. I can’t believe we’ll be starting weaning soon, although I’m not in any huge rush! I think weaning will be different this time round as Gabe already tries to eat everything he gets his hands on where Toby never really put anything in his mouth and it was a good month or two before he really started feeding himself.

Gabe’s personality is starting to come out more now. He’s pretty chilled out these days and will quite happily sit in his bouncer or lie on the play mat for quite a long time while I get on with looking after Toby and getting stuff done. He’s absolutely fascinated with his big brother and saves most of his smiles and giggles for him. Toby for his part is becoming much more interested in Gabe now he’s realised he can get him to react, and he also helps by putting his dummy in for him or pulling his bib down off his face when he’s managed to flip it up for the fiftieth time that day! He still tries to get him to stop crying by saying ‘stop Gabe’ which isn’t always that effective! I can’t wait to see their relationship develop though and I’m sure it won’t be too long before we see them playing together and getting up to mischief!

I think that’s probably about it for this month. Another month and my little baby Gabe will be half a year old!

12 January , 201626 December , 2016 - Sarah 2 Comments

Toby is two and a half years old

I don’t know where the time has gone. I mean, I know I have a nearly five month old baby as well but how on earth did my little baby boy end up as a walking, talking, two and a half year old boy?!

And Toby really is a little boy now. He’s heading for being a metre tall (98cm at the last measuring) and he’s wearing mostly age 3-4 clothes! He’s still super skinny though – he weighs 2st 3lb having only put on 3lb in the last year. Sometimes I worry about how thin he is – you can see every rib and feel every bump in his spine. But he eats plenty (although has become quite fussy recently – more on that later) and has lots of energy so I’m assured it’s nothing to be concerned about.

Toby’s speech has come on loads in the last couple of months. He now mostly speaks in sentences, although not necessarily with all the words in the right order. He knows so many words now and manages to surprise us almost every day with what he knows. A couple of weeks ago I downloaded an app onto my phone for him to play with which has all sorts of different animals and different activities. One of them is about what animals eat and a picture of a squirrel came up. I asked Toby if he knew what squirrels eat and he came out with ‘squirrels eat acorns’ – I have no idea where he got that from! He really understands emotions now as well and will quite often say ‘my sad’ (although usually if he’s not getting his own way rather than if he’s actually sad). It’s quite likely that moments later he’ll follow it up with ‘I’m so happy now’. For the first time yesterday he actually said ‘I love my mummy’ – I tell Toby I love him all the time but he has never said it to me before. I was so surprised I had to get him to repeat it!

Toby still wants to do everything for himself – ‘Toby do it’ or ‘my do it’ is still heard several times a day. This is mostly great and we do try and encourage him to do things for himself, but it can be occasionally frustrating when it means everything takes three times as long! He really can do lots of things though, his motor skills are great for his age and he has no trouble doing things like unscrewing lids. He still struggles with putting shoes and coats on but he’s trying and getting better all the time. He loves climbing and jumping too, although he can take his time to get used to things like soft play before he’s confident enough to go off exploring on his own. He’s quite happy to go running off up a hill if we’re out for a walk somewhere though!

The main big change since I wrote Toby’s 27 month update is that he has now moved into his big boy bed. The cot he had isn’t one that converts to a bed (and we’ll be needing it for Gabe soon anyway) so we decided just to move him straight into a single bed. And on the whole it has been a resounding success. We let Toby ‘help’ when we dismantled the cot and built the bed so he would know exactly what was going on, and I’d got him some space themed bedding to go with the rest of his room. We have a Lindam bed guard to stop him falling out of bed and so far at least he hasn’t got out of bed at all once he is put in at night. Even when he wakes up in the morning he just sits there waiting on the bed until one of us goes to get him up. We still have one wake up a night most nights and I usually end up getting in bed with him to get him back to sleep. Although he hasn’t woken up for the last two nights so fingers crossed that continues.

Toby is still going to nursery four afternoons a week and things have settled down since he started his new nursery back in October. He still cries every day when I drop him off but they tell me he calms down within a few minutes and then he’s absolutely fine. We were getting concerned that he was refusing to eat his tea at nursery but that seems to be improving since he went back after the Christmas break.

Food generally can be a bit frustrating – from weaning up until about six months ago Toby would eat anything you put in front of him but in the last few months he has become increasingly fussy. He’ll like something one day then refuse it the next, or he’ll ask for something then refuse to eat it. I was starting to get stressed at meal times and we were all getting wound up with Barry and me trying to encourage Toby to eat, and then getting annoyed when he didn’t, then he would get upset and totally refuse to eat anything. Then I read something a couple of weeks ago (I’d link to it but I can’t remember where I read it!) which basically said just live by the six words ‘you don’t have to eat it’. Provide a variety of different foods and try and include at least one thing at every meal that you think they are likely to eat and then leave them to it. And do you know what? It’s actually working. I’m less stressed and therefore so it Toby, meaning he’s probably eating more anyway.

We’ve also realised that by letting Toby help prepare food, even if it’s just getting the cereal off the shelf or putting potatoes in the pan, he is much more likely to sit at the table without any fuss. I’ve been doing quite a lot of baking with Toby lately too – we’ve made gingerbread biscuits (or ginner man biggits as Toby calls them), chocolate cake and banana bread. Even though he can’t really do much at the moment he enjoys standing on a chair in the kitchen with an apron on and putting things in bowls or stirring. I even got him washing up after making the banana bread yesterday. Start as we mean to go on eh?

Even though he has got more fussy about food, he’s just like his mum in that he never says no to cake or chocolate! He doesn’t have loads of sweet foods but he certainly enjoys them. I’m doing my best not to use sweet things as ‘treats’ or rewards. I have such a terrible relationship with food and my weight and I really don’t want to pass that on to Toby so we’re trying to just see sweet things as foods we eat sometimes, just like everything else. Although to be honest at the moment I’m just happy to get some extra calories into him in the hope of trying to put on at least a little bit of weight!

On the whole Toby is just a lovely little boy and we couldn’t be more proud of him. I know every parent says that but he really is amazing…most of the time! Several people have commented on how polite he is, and he does say please and thank you, mostly without prompting. He’s starting to become a really lovely big brother too. I think now Gabe is smiling and a bit more responsive he’s getting a bit more interesting for Toby. He likes to show him toys and will pull his bib down for him when Gabe’s managed to cover his face for the tenth time that morning! I actually can’t wait for the next few months when hopefully we’ll see a real relationship start to develop between them.

I could probably keep writing about Toby all day, and I’m sure there were things I wanted to say that I’ve forgotten (oh yeah, potty training – that’s still nowhere near happening!) but I think this post is probably long enough already! I can’t believe the next update I’ll be writing about Toby will be when he’s three. He certainly isn’t a baby any more.

Linking up with Lauren at Belle Du Brighton for #WhatMyKidDid

23 December , 2015 - Sarah 1 Comment

Gabriel is four months old

I’m a little bit late with Gabe’s update this month – if you’ve read any of my posts over the last week or so you’ll know we’ve all been ill with various coughs and colds and unfortunately blogging just hasn’t been top of the agenda. Also, I blame Barry who has got me into playing Fallout 4 on the PlayStation so if I do have a spare half hour in the evening then that’s what I’ve mostly been up to!

Anyway, contrary to what I usually say, it actually feels like quite a long time since I wrote Gabe’s three month update. Although I still can’t quite believe that he is already four months old!

After needing to be held almost constantly for the first two months of his life Gabe has now turned out to be a rather chilled out baby. He’ll now quite happily sit in his bouncer or lie wriggling on his play mat while I get on with things around the house or when I’m occupied with Toby. He still has times when he being held is the only option – he has especially liked to show his daddy this side at 4 am over the last week!

Gabe is feeding and napping in more of a regular pattern now too. He usually wakes up once in the night for a bottle, which is OK apart from that he then often seems to wake up again a couple of hours later (at around 5:30) and be ready to start the day. He then has four bottles through the rest of the day, two or three naps and is in bed asleep by 7 pm. I try and make sure he gets at least one of his naps at home in bed and he sleeps for anything from 30 minutes to two and a half hours!

He is still taking Gaviscon and ranitidine for reflux although I’m actually not entirely sure he needs them. He certainly doesn’t have the same severity of symptoms that Toby had. Gabe still has some days when he’s really sick but quite often he seems fine. I’m thinking of trying him without the ranitidine after Christmas – there’s really no way of knowing whether he needs it or not other than trying it.

I don’t know how much Gabe weighs now – the last time he was weighed was at 14 weeks and he weighed 13lb 7oz so I’m sure he’s well over a stone by now. He’s definitely long like his brother – I’ve just had to move him into 6-9 month sleepsuits, although most of his other 3-6 month clothes still fit.

He’s full of personality these days and pulls the funniest faces sometimes. He’s such a chatterbox, he gurgles and babbles much more than Toby ever did. He’s full of smiles too, big grins that are so adorable! It seems he hasn’t inherited the dimples that Barry and I have like his brother did.

Gabe has developed massively with his gross motor skills this month. He loves grabbing at the toys on his play mat or bouncer, he’s really close to rolling over too. He’s definitely found his hands this month too and can often be found with several fingers (or a whole fist) stuffed in his mouth.

He is totally fascinated with his brother too. He sits and watches him as he plays, and quite often if he’s getting a bit grumpy waiting for a feed he’ll stop crying when Toby goes over to him. And as for Toby, he is definitely more tolerant of Gabe now, although he’ll still often tell me to put Gabe in his bouncer or put him in bed when he wants me to himself. I think he’s starting to get a bit more interesting for Toby now too so I’m hopeful that he will continue to interact with Gabe more over the next few months.

I think that’s probably about it for this month, I can’t believe that in another couple of months we’ll be starting to think about weaning and it won’t be long until Gabe’s on the move then the chaos will really start!

17 November , 201516 November , 2015 - Sarah 4 Comments

Gabriel is three months old

I swear it was only two minutes since I was writing Gabe’s two month update – time really does fly with a baby in the house! So what has Gabe been getting up to now he’s three months old?

He continues to grow, although he’s not quite as big as Toby was at the same age. I had him weighed nearly two weeks ago and he was 12lb 1oz so I’m sure he’s more than that now. He’s also moving into all 3-6 month clothes, after growing out of the last of the bigger 0-3 month sleepsuits. We just got a bag of Toby’s old clothes down out of the loft so I’m going to swap everything over tomorrow…and then see if I can justify any more shopping, but I think probably not!

Although I said in Gabe’s two month update that I had finished breastfeeding altogether I actually carried on giving the odd comfort feed for a few more weeks and I think he was close to 11 weeks when he had his last breastfeed. He is now usually having five bottles a day, and amazingly for the last three nights he hasn’t had a night feed at all! Yep, he has slept from 7 pm to around 6 am for the last three nights! I am under no illusion that this is likely to be a permanent situation, after all Toby slept for a solid 13 hours every night from being 10 weeks old… until he was 18 weeks old and then he never slept consistently again until he was two! However, it’s a promising sign that he can do and I can only live in hope that it carries on. I’m certainly enjoying not having to get up in the night for the moment.

Day time naps are going quite as well but we are making some progress there. Gabe does usually have at least one nap a day in his crib, sometimes more, and his other naps are either in the car or on my lap while I watch TV when Toby is at nursery in the afternoons. Some naps in his crib he manages two hours but more often it’s between 45 minutes and an hour. There is a sure fire way to get him to have a long nap and that is for me to have a nap with him in bed…which is lovely, but not always practical! Anyway, I’m just going to keep persevering and hopefully he’ll get into more of a nap routine soon. It’s hard to know how much of a role Gabe’s reflux his having on his ability (or inability) to nap. It’s difficult to get the timings of his feeds right – if I put him down too soon after a feed then he’s just sick, but if I wait too long then he gets over tired or starts to get hungry again. His reflux does seem to be mostly under control now – he’s still on Gaviscon and ranitidine. He still struggles after feeds sometimes, crying with pain, and it seems some days he’s much more sick than others, but on the whole he doesn’t seem too bothered by it.

We’re still not getting loads of smiles but it is lovely when he does. He’s definitely a lot more aware of what is going on around him now and will watch as we move around the room. He’s starting to grab at the toys on his bouncy chair now, and even manages to get them sometimes too. He’s making moves towards trying to roll over from his back to his front too, although I think he’s quite a way off actually doing it yet.

I think that’s about it for this month. I still can’t believe how fast time is going. We already don’t have a tiny newborn, and I bet it’ll seem like no time at all until he’s rolling over, sitting up, and then we’ll be weaning before we know it! I think I said last month that I don’t want to wish the time away but I’m very excited for what is soon to come.

19 October , 2015 - Sarah 1 Comment

Gabriel is two months old

Two months old already. As life continues at breakneck pace it seems like Gabe has been a part of our family for much longer than two months now. He certainly doesn’t look like the tiny baby who arrived onto our living room floor back in August! As I’ve mentioned in some of my weekly Living Arrows posts we are slowly figuring things out and settling into some sort of routine. I’m still finding some days a struggle looking after Gabe and Toby – there’s still quite a lot of CBeebies getting watched but everyone is surviving and I’m just telling myself that Toby is learning some really important life lessons from Bing and Mr Tumble.

If you read my post a few weeks ago about the beginning of the end for breastfeeding you’ll already know that we were slowly heading towards completely bottle feeding. Well, I last breastfed Gabe on Friday, and it worked wonders on Thursday night when he was really unsettled after having his first immunisations, but these have only been comfort feeds and he is getting all his nutrition now from formula. I’m pleased we made to eight weeks with him getting at least some breast milk but I’m also happy that we have made the right decision for all of us as a family. Gabe is still suffering from reflux and giving him bottles means he can have Gaviscon much more easily. He’s also taking ranitidine which helps to control the acid. We seem to have things under control with the reflux, and although I’m sad he has to suffer from it at all, at least we’re managing it. And he’s gaining weight well – he was up to 10 lb 4.5 oz on Thursday, which means he’s put on 2 lb in as many weeks! He’s almost growing out of some of his 0-3 sleepsuits now too – his feet are right in the bottom, especially when he’s got a big cloth nappy on at night. Speaking of cloth nappies Gabe still hasn’t worn a disposable since he was three days old and he’s now too big for some of the newborn nappies so he’s graduated to the birth to potty ones and so both he and Toby are wearing the same nappies and I’m having to wash them nearly every day – time for some nappy shopping I think!

Bottle feeding Gabe has helped us get into a routine of feeds roughly every three hours through the day with naps in between (in theory). I’m trying my best to get Gabe to nap in his crib at home but a lot of the time I just end up putting him in our Lillebaby carrier which seems to have magical properties that send him straight to sleep. I actually think I could get him to nap in his crib more if I could spend ten or fifteen minutes settling him but I can’t leave Toby roaming the house for that long on his own so if Gabe doesn’t fall asleep within five minutes then into the carrier he goes! He’s sleeping very well at night though which is brilliant. We’ve now got our bedtime routine pretty much down and both boys are usually in bed asleep by 7:30 pm. Gabe will then generally sleep until somewhere between midnight and 3 am. His wake ups have been getting a bit earlier lately but I can sometimes put him off for another hour with a dummy and a rub on the back – that’s when having the co-sleeper crib really comes into its own. I’m usually up with him for an hour – he tends to drink his milk with a break in the middle for a burp and a nappy change. I had a few nights a week or so ago when I was up with him for two hours but thankfully we seem to back to an hour again now. After that he then sleeps until about 6 am and I’m not sure whether he might sleep a bit longer but Barry has to get up for work then and I think that maybe disturbs him. Whilst Gabe is sharing a room with us (and he will be for a while yet because we don’t really have any other options) there’s not a lot we can do about it anyway.

We starting to get a lot more smiles now which is so lovely. He doesn’t smile that often but when he does treat you to one it lights up his whole face. I still can’t tell if he’s got dimples like Toby though! He’s very alert now and always looking around to see what’s going on. He’s also a lot happier just to sit in his bouncy chair for a while which makes a world of difference to me – I can usually manage to eat my breakfast without a baby strapped to my front at least!

I’m trying not to wish away these newborn days but I can’t help but look forward to the next few months as Gabe continues to develop and starts to interact a bit more. I’m hoping that as that happens Toby might start to find him a bit more interesting too and they can amuse each other rather than constantly demanding my attention (although I am well aware that that is going to carry on for years yet!)

So, at two months old Gabe is well and truly a part of the family now. I’m proud of myself that I’m coping with two kids and despite some tough days we are all getting along just fine!

14 October , 20152 July , 2016 - Sarah 1 Comment

Toby is 27 months old

OK, so I know 27 months seems an odd age to do an update post but that’s when the health visitors round here do a development check so yesterday we had a visit to see if Toby is doing everything he ‘should’ be at 27 months old. We were sent a questionnaire to complete before the health visitor came – most of it was pretty straight forward; things like can he run, walk upstairs, eat with a fork, identify body parts, stack seven bricks, put three or four words together, but some of the other questions seemed a bit odd; does he copy you if you open and close your mouth or pull your earlobe? No, he doesn’t. I mean why would he? He might do if I asked him to but he’s more likely to just look at me like I’ve gone a bit mental! Or another one was if something is out of his reach will he get a chair or box and climb on it to get whatever it is. Also no. Mostly because he’s really tall so most things are within his reach. And if they aren’t then that’s probably because we’ve purposely put them out of his reach and would tell him not to if he started trying to climb on a chair to reach them. Stupid questionnaire!

Anyway, the health visitor didn’t have any concerns with Toby and neither do we. Physically he can do everything other two year olds are doing. He’s very active and loves running and climbing and jumping off things. Mostly he likes jumping on his daddy! He’s still very tall for his age, although at 2 st 2lbs he hasn’t put on much weight at all this year. At two years and three months he’s starting to wear age 3-4 clothes from some shops and is wearing size 8 shoes.

Toby’s very affectionate (when he wants to be) and loves having cuddles on the sofa and giving out kisses when he’s in the mood. He is so polite, and it makes me very proud – he says please and thank you without being prompted. He’s very well behaved most of the time, and usually does what he’s asked, even if sometimes it takes a few times of asking! He’s good at tidying up after himself too – sometimes he seems to enjoy tidying toys away more than he does playing with them. He’s got a set of wooden blocks that he likes nothing more than just to take out of the box and put back in again. Although, he’s quite a fan of the tower too – remember that questionnaire asking can he stack seven bricks? I decided to actually see what he could manage today….16 bricks! Nailed that one. He’s so clever too – he can count to 13 (because that’s how many stairs there are in our house), he knows most of his colours, he can identify all 50 of the flash cards in the set we have…he surprises us every day with just how much he knows and can do.

Toby has recently become really friendly too, saying hello and goodbye to people in shops, or the postman when he comes to the door. He also likes to say hello and goodbye to lots of other things too – it can take five minutes to leave the park as he says ‘bye bye slide, bye bye swing…’ today we even had ‘bye bye shop’ after we’d been to the post office! He likes to be helpful whenever he can too. He likes to bring things for Gabe when I’m feeding him. Admittedly they aren’t always things he needs, or wants but it’s still adorable when he presents me with a teddy or a muslin with a ‘there you go Gabe’. Yesterday he was determined to give Gabe his dummy, even when it was quite clear that he really didn’t want it.

I know I’m sounding like Toby is some sort of angel child here – of course he has his fair share of tantrums and whining. He’s going through a bit of a phase of just crying whenever he doesn’t get exactly what he wants, when he wants it, or quite often it will because he wants to do something for himself when he either can’t, or just it would be much easier to do it myself. One of his favourite phrases at the moment is ‘my do it!’ I have to admit I sometimes take the easy road and just let him have his own way if it will avoid a meltdown. At the moment I just feel like he’s coping with so many changes – a new brother and a new nursery, and he’s adjusting so well really that if I can let him have his own way about things sometimes (and I’m not talking about anything major, just things like which shoes he wears, or what to have for lunch) then I can make his life a bit easier and less stressful…which in turn of course makes life easier and less stressful for me too.

I’m sure there’ll be lots more changes for Toby over the next few months – we really need to get him in his big boy bed soon, there’s toilet training to think about at some point (although I don’t think he’s anywhere near ready yet) and the biggest change of all will, hopefully, be a move down to England (and there’ll be much more on that from me in future blog posts!). I have no doubt though that our adorable boy will continue to grow and thrive and amaze us every day.

This last photo was taken one day after nursery a few weeks ago – Toby had been playing in the garden and this picture just captures him in all his snot-covered, grime-coated, adorable two-ness!

3 October , 2015 - Sarah 13 Comments

Breastfeeding: The beginning of the end

I’ve tried. No one can say I haven’t tried. But as I sit here at 5 am having been feeding a baby for the last hour and twenty minutes I think this is the beginning of the end for breastfeeding and me.

In fact, the beginning of the end was probably when I gave Gabe formula when he was just a day old. Or maybe it was when I started using nipple shields on his second feed. Or perhaps when a second or third bottle in the day became the norm rather than the exception about a week ago. Who knows?

I think maybe though that breastfeeding and me are just not meant to be. For me it’s just not the wonderful experience all the breastfeeding literature and baby books tell you it’s going to be. In fact, dare I say it, I simply don’t like it. I don’t feel any special bond with my baby as we sit ‘enjoying’ those breastfeeding cuddles. What I often feel is pain (because yes, even seven weeks on, with nipple shields, it still hurts half the time), and frustration that it takes so long to feed a baby in the way nature intended when I could bottle feed him in a third of the time. I don’t know, maybe cave women didn’t have much to do with their days so they could sit around feeding all day but I have a toddler to look after and a house to run and I just can’t sustain breastfeeding my baby for endless hours of every day.

I know everyone talks about the convenience of breastfeeding; no bottles to wash and sterilise, no formula to prepare, no need to plan ahead because you’ve always got milk on tap, and I suppose it is all those things but when every feed takes over an hour, feeding in public involves trying to get a baby latched on to a nipple shield without showing everyone your entire boob…then suddenly it’s not that convenient after all.

So I don’t really know where we’re going to go from here. I guess I’ll just take it one day at a time. Gabe is already getting half his feeds from a bottle and I reckon by the time he gets to 8 weeks old we won’t be breastfeeding at all.

And yes, it makes me a bit sad. I really hoped that breastfeeding was going to work out for us this time. By Toby’s six week check I wasn’t breastfeeding him at all so we’ve already made it further than that. So Toby was formula fed from about five weeks and he’s turned out OK and I’m sure Gabe will too. There’s still plenty to be proud of; that we made it this far, that I’ve managed to breastfeed in the park, and in the Night Garden(!), that I’ve tried my best to find a balance that works for all of us. I think I just need to accept that breastfeeding and me are not meant to be. But no one can say I didn’t try.

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