I have been a bit lax with my Siblings Project posts this year and in fact haven’t written one since January! This has partly been because I haven’t really managed to take many pictures of Toby and Gabe together, and partly because not much has changed on the the sibling relationship front.
This month’s photos are just a few from my phone over the last couple of months, as that is all I have. There’s a couple of good ones in there anyway…
We still have odd moments of affection, and Gabe still clearly adores his big brother and wants to do everything he does, but most of their time is spent bickering and fighting. Whatever one has the other one wants, whether it’s a toy, food, a stick or even a random bit of fluff off the carpet! Gabe’s default mode at the moment just seems to be wailing at everything, especially when he can’t have what he wants, so there is quite a lot of crying in our house on a daily basis. Read more
Welcome back to another Siblings update – this is only going to be a short one as it’s not that long since I wrote the last one. I wanted to get back on track with linking up in the middle of the month though so here it is.
Things are much the same with Toby and Gabe they still annoy each other all the time but we are seeing a more and more moments of them actually being affectionate towards each other and getting along. It’s so funny though – Toby has realised that if he gives Gabe a spontaneous cuddle then he will usually get some praise or acknowledgement. We’ll often say something like ‘that’s kind’ or ‘what a lovely cuddle’ – so now if we don’t say something straight away Toby will say ‘look at us mummy’ or ‘I’m cuddling Gabe’ just to make sure we realise he’s being cute! He’s too clever for his own good sometimes.
The best moments for me though are the ones that I catch that aren’t just being done for my benefit. Read more
I haven’t got much new to add in this month’s Siblings Project post. Toby is tolerating Gabe slightly more, and Gabe still wants to do everything his big brother is doing.
We are still having odd moments when they actually manage to play together but more often than not Toby just gets annoyed when Gabe crawls all over whatever he is trying to play with, or tries to eat the pieces of whatever toy he has. I know it will only get better as they both get a bit older but for now, playing referee is driving me a bit bonkers!
I haven’t managed to get many pictures of my boys together this month but here’s a few that I did capture…
Looking out over the balcony together – Gabe is getting so big now but I think it will be a while yet before he catches Toby up!
Toby ‘helping’ Gabe play with some of his birthday presents.
Toby pushing his brother on the swing – I had to intervene when he got a bit over enthusiastic though!
And that’s it for this month. I’m hoping next month I might be able to write even more about how Toby and Gabe are playing together. I really think it will help when Gabe starts walking, although then Toby will have even less chance of being left alone…
There have been a lot of big changes for Toby and Gabe since I wrote last month’s Siblings Project post; we’ve spent three weeks living with Grandma and Grandad, moved house, and now the boys are sharing a bedroom. So far they haven’t really disturbed each other that much – there have been a couple of times when Gabe has woken Toby up with his crying in the night but usually he goes back to sleep pretty quickly. I can’t wait for their bedroom to be properly finished so I can share it with you.
Toby still gets frustrated with Gabe quite a lot and isn’t always very good at sharing but we are seeing more glimpses of the relationship I hope they will have in the next year or two. Toby is still Gabe’s favourite person and they’ve had a lot of giggles together this month. I think you can see in this picture that they are really starting to look alike too – especially their eyes and noses. Maybe once Gabe has a bit more hair, and a few more teeth, they’ll look more alike.
They are even starting to play together a bit now, and Toby seems to be realising that he can show Gabe how to do things and Gabe will understand.
Gabe just wants to do whatever his brother is doing these days – even if that is getting in the soft toy basket and being buried by teddies!
After last month’s Siblings post when I was saying that Toby hadn’t been showing much affection towards his brother he does seem to have warmed to him a bit more this month. There have been a few more unsolicited kisses and cuddles, although he still quite often just shouts whenever Gabe comes near him! There have been a few moments when they have almost being playing together though. Or at least both doing the same thing at the same time!
I actually managed to get a few better photos of Toby and Gabe together this month too. These ones were taken when we went out for lunch a couple of weeks ago – don’t you just love their matching outfits?
There are more cuddles appearing from Toby, although Gabe might argue it’s sometimes more of a strangle hold than a cuddle. I can’t wait for Gabe to get a bit bigger so he can actually give him a cuddle back.
Gabe still absolutely adores his brother and always wants to be near him, doing whatever he’s doing (which is where most of the arguments come from at the moment). Toby always says he loves Gabe but for now he doesn’t always show it! I’m hoping that changes though as they both get a bit older…
Amongst the illness of the last month the relationship between Toby and Gabe is continuing to develop. Things haven’t really changed too much though; Gabe still absolutely adores his brother and is always ready with a smile or a laugh for him. He’s starting to discover the joy of playing with all Toby’s toys too and now he’s on the move nothing is safe from his little hands. Toby still seems to see Gabe as a mixture of someone to entertain and give the odd kiss to, and something of an inconvenience who takes up far too much of mummy’s time still.
I am though catching more and more glimpses of what their relationship might be like in another year or so, when Gabe can really interact and they can properly play together. Yesterday I left them in the living room for two minutes whilst I was tidying up in the kitchen and came back to this sight…
Now pulling tissues out of the box is a favourite game of Gabe’s so I said ‘oh Gabe, what a mess you’ve made’ to which Toby piped up ‘And me!’ They’re going to get up to some mischief aren’t they?
Gabe is a very grabby baby, and he loves to grab people’s hair, especially Toby’s if he can get near him. We’re trying to teach him to be gentle and he is slowly getting the idea. And Toby is trying to be a bit more patient with him too, instead of immediately just crying and shouting for him to get off!
We are also trying to encourage Toby to share at the moment which is something he is still struggling with. However, one thing he has almost definitely shared with Gabe this week is his chicken pox! Especially after Gabe had this Duplo in his mouth (it’s a crocodile’s mouth in case you weren’t sure) which had been in Toby’s mouth just a minute earlier. It’s almost inevitable that Gabe will get the pox so we’re just playing a waiting game now.
And the last picture for this month is one of those glimpses of what is to come. They were both concentrating on the bricks and for the briefest of moments neither of them was trying to take anything of the other and I’m sure that it won’t be long before we are seeing more and more moments like this between my wonderful brothers.
I sound a bit like a stuck record with these posts but not much has changed with Toby and Gabe’s relationship in the last month.
Gabe still absolutely adores his big brother and is always looking to see what he’s up to. Toby still likes making Gabe laugh and smile, but still spends a lot of time saying ‘no Gabe, that’s mine’. We’re working on the sharing though and Toby will do it but only on his own terms. We were sitting playing with his Duplo the other day and Gabe was trying to grab all the bricks. I got one and asked Toby if Gabe could play with it. We got the usual ‘no, that’s mine’, but then 30 seconds later he picked a different brick and gave it to Gabe with a ‘Gabe have this one’.
Toby has also recently started saying ‘I love you’ (I love you mummy melts my heart every time) and if you ask him who he loves he’ll tell you ‘mummy, daddy and Gabe’ – it’s too cute!
Toby has also taken it upon himself to become Gabe’s official spokesperson. He likes to tell me that Gabe is tired, but this is mostly because he wants me to take him upstairs for a nap because that’s quite often the time I let him play the CBeebies app on my Kindle. Or when I’m getting Gabe something to eat Toby will inform me ‘Gabe doesn’t want it’ or ‘Gabe doesn’t like it’ but there doesn’t seem to be any ulterior motive for that one!
I’ve not really managed to get any good photos of Toby and Gabe together this month. Gabe has been ill for weeks now and unfortunately not really in the mood for photos most of the time. I took this one on my iPhone the other day and it’s a bit blurry but Toby wanted to play Ring O’Roses with Gabe and he seemed to think it was pretty good fun too!
And although Toby doesn’t look too convinced about me interrupting his breakfast look how excited Gabe is to be sat near his brother.
I thought I would try and grab a few more pictures this morning but it didn’t quite go to plan! Gabe is very ‘grabby’ at the moment and was getting a bit overenthusiastic in his cuddling….
The relationship between Toby and Gabe has continued to develop this month. Toby is very pleased with the fact he can make Gabe laugh and will always tell me when he’s done it which is very sweet. He still veers between being kind and giving Gabe toys and complaining or trying to take them off him when he thinks that they are his. I’m sure that will only get worse as Gabe gets bigger and wants to play with everything!
Gabe is still completely fascinated by Toby and will always give him a smile, even when he’s being totally grumpy with everyone else.
I love the photos that I managed to take of the boys together this month. They were just taken on a morning at home, when Gabe was full of a cold and mostly feeling sorry for himself…but just look at them together.
And look how Gabe looks at his big brother…
Neither of them look entirely convinced about this cuddle though…
Toby loves to give his brother kisses on the head…
…But he doesn’t always think about where his hands are going…
I love the pair of them so much and I’m so glad there’s a real bond starting to develop between them. I can’t wait until Gabe is crawling and walking and really big enough to play with his brother.
The Siblings Project is curated by the lovely Lucy over at dear beautiful (the same Lucy who is behind Me & Mine). I have always enjoyed reading other people’s siblings posts and when Gabe was born last year I did think about joining in but… as usual life got in the way and I just never seemed to get round to it. Added to which there hasn’t been a huge amount to say about Toby and Gabe’s relationship up to this point.
For the last six months I have watched as Toby has gone from mostly just tolerating his little brother (with the odd flash of affection) to finding him quite interesting some of the time. He is actually now very loving and considerate towards Gabe; he especially likes bringing him toys or sharing food with him (even though Gabe isn’t actually eating anything yet); he sometimes gives him random kisses or holds his hand; and I think the big turning point came when he realised he could make Gabe smile and laugh.
Gabe absolutely adores his brother already. He always has a smile for Toby even when he’s suffering with teething and a cold like he has been this week. He watches him with such fascination as runs and jumps around the living room. He also likes to show his affection by trying to touch Toby’s face or grab his hair (although Toby’s not so keen on this part).
I managed to capture some lovely moments between my boys on camera this month so I decided it was time I joined in with the siblings project. I’m sure from now on the bond between them is only going to grow…